Last night I started writing a blog titled SCREAM...it was about how my baby was screaming her head off for two hours, but now that she is cooing happily it doesn't seem right to publish it!
So instead I will write about what many people want to hear about...ME! OK. Not really but kind of...
I love all the well meaning people who say "My you have your hands full!" The funny thing is I only have two of my kids with me when most people say this. It seems like when I have all four of them with me they don't have the courage to say anything. Maybe it's because I look like I will bite the head off of anyone who might try and say a smart comment about having my hands full or being so brave. Honestly I don't consider myself brave at all. In fact sometimes I wonder why God would have given these children to me. I am so incapable. I don't have the patience for them all. I don't have enough love for them all. I don't have enough time for them all. I guess that's just it...I don't have enough of anything, but with God I have enough of everything.
I know sometimes people might be worried about me. Worried that I am running myself ragged with having so many kids (It's interesting to me that having 4 kids makes you a large family!) all so close in age...and still myself being so young. The truth...I am running myself ragged sometimes, but those are the times when I am not trusting in the fact that God knows what he is doing. We didn't plan for any of our kids...I am not saying that we didn't want them...we love all of them so much! But we were at times taking measures to not have kids. And what happen each time we still had a kid. Does that tell you something? It tells me something...God wanted us to have all of our girls at the time that we had them. So yes there is 20 months or less between our kids and we didn't plan it that way, but God did.
To answer the question that always comes after telling people that yes they are all mine, yes they are all close in age and no we were not trying for a boy. Are we going to have more kids? I don't know. I didn't plan on having 4 kids...but I have 4! So I must say if God wants to intrust us with more children I am sure He will, and I am sure I will not be prepared for another one, but God will help me along with that.
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Oh, thank you so much for this post. It really spoke to me. I have three kids and I get looks and comments, too. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed and it is good to know that other moms feel the same at times. I also feel so very blessed and amazed that God has entrusted me (and my hubby) with these miracles. Thank you for sharing so honestly.
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